SERIAL Episode 5- "What A Fine Fucking Mess"

noahcrash · by **noahcrash** » Mon Jun 02, 2008 7:44 am

This episode had these things said about it:

"seamless..dammit I want more"- QB
"better and better everytime"- Lauryn
"really great job"- MarkVigil
"It had one of my favorite scenes ever"- JD
"I felt a range of emotions reading it"- Ben
"Touching"- Auntie

SERIAL EPISODE 5- "What A Fine Fucking Mess"

*Scene opens with a title of "TWO WEEKS AGO" showing Eugene half- burying the body of Jo in the park. Then he waits for the postman to come, comes up and axes him in the face, takes Jo's letter out, carries the mailman off to the same ground Jo is buried in. Then, we move to Lauryn seeing the note in her apartment as Eugene comes out of the restroom and Oba says "BLOOD BLOOD" upon seeing Hailies.

*Scene moves to PRESENT. Auntie is downstairs with Nick and Armaan. The Man In Bandages is faking sleep as we see. Auntie is doing shots and having Armaan do them as well as Nick.

Armaan- (after downing shot of whiskey) Damn, that fucking burns!
Auntie- (cackling) You'll get used to it if you hang around me.
Nick- (under breath) That's for sure!
Armaan- I still can't believe what you done for me. (clearing throat, trying not to vomit) Noone has ever stepped up for me like that. I thought that Captain was going to shit his pants. He was so mad. And here its been two weeks and you still seem to care about me. How did you handle that officer anyway?
Auntie- Well, Armaan, when you've been around awhile, you learn how to navigate.
Armaan- I hope to fulfill all your expectations, Auntie.
Auntie- I see potential in you, Armaan. I don't mean that I necessarily agree with everything you've done. Murder is never something to do in passion. It is merely alright when it is a necessity. I just liked that you had the ability to fire a gun. It is truly amazing how many people cannot. It is very simple really. One singular pull. (pause) And then you must also have the ability to take that kick that will get you when you're done. In my experience, its the kick that gets the puller everytime.
Nick- Things have gotten strange around here.
Auntie- I think things are lining up nicely actually. I put the fear of Auntie into them just like I wanted. I am also quite glad I have Liv spying around for me. She's a girl who knows just where she is going.
Nick- I have kind of been pinching myself lately. I meet you like 17 days ago and suddenly my whole life is different. I'm not even quite sure when it changed.
Auntie- About the time you first came! (downs another shot) (looks at Armaan) We need to get you hooked up too, Army! I personally think Liv could be had (pause) with some persuasion and cunning.
Armaan- (a bit sullen) I haven't really been interested in anything like that lately. (flashes of shooting Alex, shooting Wegie and Ryan) I will when I feel like it.
Auntie- Good to strike when the iron is hot. Things are changing around here now. I mean you got crazy Hailies in a psycho ward (cackles), Greta watching Kimmys baby since the falling out between Kimmy and Lauryn, Liv spying for me, Ayn left Amauriel and moved in with Kaitlyn, Wout moving in and trying to woo JD, Glenn sucking up to me, That little Garrett boy making out with the Hell girl at all hours, Em is back in her coke habit and Ben..he's always changing. I am really glad that Jo left. She saved me from having to dispose of her. (pause) I don't like killing you know.
Nick- (uncomfortable) And then theres him (points at the man in bandages) What are we going to do with him?
Auntie- For now, just what we are. He is nothing but ransom money to me. When it's paid up, I'll let him go. If it isn't paid, which I'm starting to think will be the case, I'll just have to dispose of him too.
Armaan- I'd like to do that myself if it were to happen.
Auntie- Hold it, Quick Draw! Your trigger finger is starting to creep me out a little. You shouldn't be so eager to take a life. With every life you take, it's a piece of you that fires out of that round hole.
Armaan- I guess so.
Nick- I need to go the restroom. (uncomfortable with conversation)

*Auntie's cell rings with the ringtone of My Sister! Auntie cackles, walking off into another room.

Sassy- Hey Cryptkeeper, you sitting down?
Auntie- I'm walking actually. What the hell is it? (walks into corner)
Sassy- I just got an interesting call (pause) from Paps.
Auntie- What's that son of a bitch want?
Sassy- Well, he's dying, Arlene. He's in a hospice.
Auntie- Ass cancer I hope.
Sassy- It's cancer..though not of the ass.
Auntie- I figured as much. It's about time he joined Mom.
Sassy- Do you wanna go down there?
Auntie- Actually I do. I got some things I need to discuss with him.
Sassy- Oh shit!
Auntie- I guess we'll be taking a road trip.
Sassy- Well, if we do, I can't stomach that stunt cock of yours. It's me and you ONLY!
Auntie- I actually agree with you for once. (looking for Nick) Besides if I'm going to be gone, I need more than one person taking care of things.
Sassy- And theres actually one more thing.
Auntie- What's that?
Sassy- Aunt Geraldine done said that a certain cowboy is already around.
Auntie- (in disgusted tone) Goddammit! That motherfucker aint never gonna learn.
Sassy- Double negative again, Auntie!
Auntie- Oh, shut your fucking pussy trap!
Sassy- (cackling) You are one twisted sister who might need a little past life trangression. And meanwhile, I have to cancel this weekend with my girlfriend. (pause)- But are you truly ready to see him again?
Auntie- I guess I should've expected him to pop around. I can deal with it. Just pack your tampons and shit and I'll be there in an hour! I know its your time of the month too. We're like clockwork. And I AM DRIVING! (hangs up)
Nick- (coming into room) Where are you going?
Auntie- Back home. Daddy's dyin. I bet I'm not in the will either.
Nick- Oh, I'm sorry Auntie.
Auntie- Why? I'm not.
Nick- Oh.
Auntie- Yes. I am going to have to leave you and Armaan in charge while I'm gone. The weekend tops. I can't hang around there for long but I do have some unfinished business that needs attended to.
Nick- You know I'll watch things for you, Auntie.
Auntie- I know you will Nick. (kisses him) I am not worried about that.
Nick- Who's the "him" you mentioned on the phone?
Auntie- A very distant HIM, Nick. Nothing to worry about. (pause) Now I gotta pack!
Nick- Are you sure you dont need me there?
Auntie- I am quite sure. This is something I need to take care of on my own.

OPENING CREDITS ROLL with Mad World

*Scene opens with Greta watching a sleeping Harley Quinn. There is a knock at her door. She walks over and it is KIMMY.

Kimmy- Hi Greta. I am here to get Harley Qunn.
Greta- Hi Kimmy. She was no problem at all.
Kimmy- (nods to Em) I really appreciate the two of you stepping up like you have where my daughter is concerned.
Em- (walking over to them) It is the least we could do with how many times you've been there for us.
Greta- (not looking completely in agreement) Have you and Lauryn talked any?
Kimmy- Fuck NO! As I said before, she will never be watching Harley again, Greta. After everything that happened at her damn house, there is no fucking way. She keeps a bunch of fucking nuts up in that shoe. Not to mention I HATE her!
Greta- I was only asking.
Em- (bringing Harley over) Here she is. She just got a fresh diaper a half hour ago.
Kimmy- (mockingly) So did Ryan. (laughs) (Noone else laughs)
Greta- Again, bring her by anytime.
Em- We would've watched her longer but we both got plans tonight. Greta has got a date. (pokes at her teasingly)
Kimmy- I understand. I'm going to let Ryan watch her tonight. I got things to do too!
Em- Well, enjoy yourself, Kimmy.
Kimmy- I plan to. (takes Harley Quinn)
Greta- Of course. Well, I need to start getting ready. Have to look nice for Adam tonight.
Kimmy- (in jest) Don't take too long. (playfully menacing laugh)

*She leaves. Greta looks a little hurt and disappointed in herself for not thinking of comeback quick enough. Em goes off to the bathroom.
When in the bathroom, EM takes out a bag of coke from her purse, puts a line out and snorts it.

*Next we see Kimmy back home with Ryan. She sets Harley down and starts to play with her as Ryan looks on. Ryan's arm is in a sling.

Kimmy- (to Harley) Hows Momma's little girl? Momma missed her. Did you miss Momma? (kisses her, nods her head for her) Well, thank you, Harley. Did you miss dad-da? (nods her head no) Oh, you did too! I know Daddy is dumb but you missed him, right? (nods her head yes) Well, you are understanding, Harley!

*Ryan looks as if he wants to say something but nothing comes out.

Kimmy- So, you sure you got enough sleep to watch her tonight?
Ryan- I am fine. Of course I did.
Kimmy- Well, don't get snippy with me. I was asking a question.
Ryan- I didn't mean to Kimmy.
Kimmy- So where is that drawing you were working on last night?
Ryan- (a little uncomfortably) I'm not quite through with it yet.
Kimmy- Well let me see what you got.
Ryan- I'll just wait until it's finished.
Kimmy- (whiningly) I want to see it now! (gets up, heading for his room)
Ryan- OK then! It's just back here.
*They go into room and Kimmy walks over to his drawings and picks up one on top, looks at it a moment and turns.
Kimmy- Well, you did say you weren't done with it. (pause) So I guess you have a lot more to do with it. It sucks right now.
Ryan- Again, I wanted to finish it first.
Kimmy- Heopefully it can be salvaged. Off to a very rough start though.
*Kimmy looks at him, walks over and rubs his crotch. She kisses him and pulls him over to bed. Ryan walks unenthused. She looks as if she wants to see him get mad and fuck her.
*She pushes him onto the bed and starts taking off his clothes. She takes his shirt off and takes hers off. She writhes against him and pulls his pants down, starts rubbing his shorts. He grabs her and rubs her breasts unenthusiastically. She rubs his crotch some more, starting to look angry.
Ryan- I'm sorry Kimmy. Maybe I am tired.
Kimmy- (hits him in the balls) You are ALWAYS tired lately. I bet your fucking sad that little bitch fantasy of yours isn't around us now. I know exactly what it is. (Ryan holds himself.doubled over) I don't know why I let you treat me this way! You're such an asshole, Ryan. And getting to be fucking worthless in the bed. (gets up angry) I guess will have to get a fucking vibrator now. (sneers at him) I sure as hell hope you haven't become some faggot. It would make one wonder the way you can't seem to get it up lately.
Ryan- I said I'm sorry Kimmy. I think I am just tired.
Kimmy- WELL I AM TOO RYAN! If you want me to go to the store and get you a fucking fag porn, tell me. If it will help you get it up, I will. (slams bedroom door and leaves)
*Ryan gets up, goes over to his drawings and looks at the one he hid in the back. It is of Lauryn out in the sun holding Harley and Kurt Cobain playing a guitar up in the sky.

**MEANWHILE in Lauryns apartment, Lauryn is talking to Oba, Eugene, Hell and Garrett in the living room. Hell is wrapped up in Garrett's arms.

Lauryn- (hands shaking) So, guys, are you sure you can handle yourselves today? I expect you to stay at the movies ALL DAY! I know four movies sounds like alot but HEY- you get to watch them for free.
Oba- Where you going? (laughs silly)
Lauryn- Well, Oba, first I am to going to see Hailies today. Then, me and Ryan get to spend the night together tonight while Kimmy is gone. We are going to hang out awhile and we will be there to pick you guys up at midnight. And remember we are sneaking around so we cannot let Kimmy know what is going on. He is doing this for me because I miss Harley so much.
Hell- We'll be good. Watching movies all day sounds like alot of fun to me. (looks at Garrett)
Garrett- I told you I'd pay mine and Helen's way.
Lauryn- No! Don't be silly, Garrett. I feel I don't do enough sometimes for you guys anyway.
Garrett- You're fine Lauryn. (pause) You dont have to keep doing so much for us lately. It wasn't your fault what happened, Lauryn.
Lauryn- (changing subject) I need to freshen up again. I'll be right back. (she goes off to the bathroom)
*Garrett hits the couch arm hard.
Hell- Don't start hurting your hands again, Garrett.
Oba- HAND! HAND!
Garrett- I'm good.
Eugene- Well the movies sound like fun. It is really kind of her to do such things.
Oba- Lauryn is a good witch. (starts saying "Theres no place like home" and clicking ankles together)
Garrett- Stop that Oba! Lauryn is not a witch at all. Be careful how you word shit.
Oba- SHIT! SHIT!
*Garrett stops Oba.
Garrett- Why do you do that? (looks at him) Sometimes I think you do stuff on purpose.
Hell- (to Garrett) Leave him be, Garrett. He can't help hisself.
Garrett- Well someone needs to teach him som etiquette, Hell. He can't go around screaming "Shit" and picking his ass in public.
Oba- ASS! ASS!
Eugene- Lets go get some stuff in your room, Oba. We're going to the movies man. We're gonna have some crazy fun.
Garrett- (to Hell) You're so damn nice! (touches her cheek) How do you get to be so damn cool?
Hell- Its because I got people like you that make me feel cool.
*Garrett kisses her- first on the lips, then the nose, then the forehead.
Garrett- I am so lucky.
Hell- Well, duh! (smiles) But I am really the lucky one. I got a hero for a boyfriend.
Garrett- What guy wouldn't want to save a beautiful gal like yourself?
Hell- I'm not beautiful.
Garrett- Oh yes you are! (looks her in the eyes) I don't think I have ever seen something so beautiful.
Hell- I forgot to mention my boyfriend is a good liar too. (laughs)
Garrett- (touches her chin, lines his eyes with hers) I am not lying. You are the most beautiful person I have ever known inside and out.
Hell- (smiles) If you are trying to get sex, you are well on your way.
Garrett- No. That isn't what I'm doing. Some people may have done that to you. (looks angry a moment) But I wouldn't. I mean every word I say to you. I know one day we'll go that next step. But only when you want to and only when it's right. You mean too much to me.
Hell- OK. (kisses him and puts her arms around him tight)

*In the restroom, Lauryn wipes her eyes. (Sees flashes of Wegie and Alex being shot and Alex's funeral) Lauryn takes a pill out of her pill box and swallows it.

*MEANWHILE France, Lin and Tish are having tea in the kitchen with QB.

France- (watching Phi) Look at her! She is still staring out that window. I know she is dying to get with one of JD's cats. I think she's even hornier than you are, Lin.
QB- Are you sure that's possible, hun? (sips his tea)
Lin- Hey now! Just because I'm a porn peddler dont mean I am not a perfect angel with a halo on. (laughs)
France- That halo gets more and more invisible. (laughs)
Lin- (teasingly) Bitch.
Tish- So did you call your girlfriend to go out tonight, France?
France- Yes but she cancelled our plans. She has been so stand-offish lately. She said she can't hang out this weekend. I don't know. Maybe she isn't as into me as I thought. Can't say I blame her!
Lin- Stop that! You are a hot woman, France, and I don't know why you say those things about yourself.
France- (still watching Phi) Well, I guess we're stuck here.
Lin- (on a him) Not necessarily. (looks at Tish) Let's go to the beach tonight. Kick out heels up and frolic on the shore.
Tish- That sounds fucking awesome.
QB- No gals as fab as yourselves should be at home on the weekend.
France- I don't know. I don't like the idea of leaving Phi alone too long. She'll scratch that screen back out and be off to fuck every cat in this city.
QB- How about this? I really don't like feel like going home tonight. Why don't I stay here and watch the house for you gals and you can all stay out all night if you wish.
Lin- You'd really do that, Q?
QB- Of course! It's not like I have anything else to do.
Tish- That is going to change if I can help it. Noone as ass-kicking as you should be single.
QB- Men don't seem to want me. So fuck em! (laughs)
Lin- You just wait, honey. Someones gonna see that special guy and whisk you away.
QB- Maybe I will get lucky and some blind man will like my scent. (self- effacing laugh)
Lin- Now dont make me bend you over and spank your ass!
QB- Atleast it's be some kind of attention to my ass.
*Everyone laughs.
Lin- So you up to the beach, gals?
France- I don't know. I am not in the mood for alot of people today.
Lin- Well, we will go to the less crowded beach.
Tish- That sounds more intimate. You should really go with us, France.
France- (after a moment) Alright, I guess so. (to QB) Are you sure you don't mind, QB?
QB- Honey, my home is emptier than a runway models head. I will be glad to be somewhere else for a night. And if I get lonely, there is always Lin's toybox.
Lin- Now I know why you wanna stay! (winks) You better clean off anything you use.
QB- I am just teasing. Some of your toys scare the fuck out of me, Lin.
*Lin laughs.
Tish- So what you gonna wear, France?
France- I have no clue.
Lin- Well, lets get ready gals. To the beach we will go! WOO HOO!

**MEANWHILE Ayn is on the phone with Ashley at Kaitlyn's, where she lives now.

Ayn- So, 6:00 then! I promise she won't suspect a thing. GREAT! (hangs up)
Kaitlyn- (coming into room) Damn did I sleep late?
Ayn- Well you did get to bed pretty late.
Kaitlyn- I just didn't feel like getting up. Every time I woke up, I said "Fuck this" and went back to sleep. (laughs)
Ayn- I just have to say again Kaitlyn..Thank you for letting me move in here.
Kaitlyn- I told you its fun to have someone else around. I don't mind the help on the rent as well. Since Auntie jacked her price up.
Ayn- OK. That's 1.00. Any mention of Auntie warrants the loss of a dollar, remember?
Kaitlyn- Yes! My bad!
Ayn- It's OK. Just more money for me. (smiles)
Kaitlyn- (looks at calendar, looks sad) So whats on the television?
Ayn- Just watching "Blade Runner" again.
Kaitlyn- That's a pretty damn good movie.
Ayn- So how is Kaitlyn this morning?
Kaitlyn- I have felt better. Has Ama called you yet this morning?
Ayn- Of course! He has already tried once. I have told him I am through with this. I have been through with it. I just want something different. You know what I mean. I have dealt with this routine for far too long. None of it does anything for me anymore. The band, the marriage, none of it! I just thank you for letting me move in.
Kaitlyn- I was just surprised you still wanted to live here and have to see him so often.
Ayn- (quickly) Well, this complex is still a great place to live. I didn't want him to win by making me leave here.
Kaitlyn- Well, I'm going to make som french toast. Want some?
Ayn- That sounds heavenly. Maybe after we could go have a day at the mall together since we're off.
Kaitlyn- Great! Well I'll get it started. (Ayn has big smile on her face) I guess I could use getting out of the house today.

**MEANWHILE Em is walking in at Mark, Marcus and Ashleys house.

Ashley- Hi Em!
Em- (jumpy) Good morning. Is everything all set for the party?
Ashley- Yes! Ayn said she won't suspect a thing.
Em- Excellent.
Marcus- I love surprise parties.
Ashley- I still dont know why Kaitlyn wouldn't tell us it's her birthday. Everyone loves birthdays, right?
Em- Speak for yourself. (laughs) The older you get, the less fun they are.
Mark- I love birthdays! That is the day you can reflect on your life so far. Every year, I stop myself and write down everything that has changed in one year.
Em- That'd be a short book for me.
Marcus- I invited Vik and Rach and most of the complex.
Em- I invited a nice gay guy I met at the bar. His name was Glenn. I can't wait for this party!
Ashley- Yes after I saw Auntie leaving, I was so damn happy. Liv told us this morning she heard that Auntie was leaving for the whole weekend. And she thinks noone knows so it's really going to be fun!
Mark- Does anyone else think Liv has been overstaying her welcome lately?
Ashley- We're all just new to her. She'll tire of us eventually. I kinda like her though.
Mark- She seems awfully unpleasant to me.
Em- Greta said she'd bring Adam back to the party when their date is through. She had just promised over a week ago she'd go out with him tonight.
Ashley- Oh, that's fine! This party will be going on ALL NIGHT if I can help it. We all need to unwind seriously bad.
Marcus- I am fully prepared to get stark raving drunk and run nakedly through the house.
Mark- (smiling) This party will be fun.
Marcus- Yes! Did anyone invite JD and them?
Ashley- Yes! I invited everyone- even Ben!
Em- Oh, man! He creeps me out. When he goes to the Dez, he just sits there mostly, drinking, silent, almost like he's waiting for something.
Mark- Maybe he's waiting to fall in love with you, Em? (smiles wickedly)
Em- Or maybe he's waiting to cut you up into little Mark pieces? (laughs)
Ashley- I don't think he's as bad as everyone thinks. I really don't.
Marcus- Well, maybe we'll see him in party mode tonight and he won't seem as freaky and introverted.
Ashley- I hope so. Ayn said 6:00. She's going to keep her out all day so we can sneak and plan it. I love being sneaky.
Em- So do I.
Marcus- Well me and Mark are in charge of alcohol supply. We're heading out in a bit.
Ashley- YES!! Man, I love a party.
Em- I'm sure this one will go in the record books.
Mark- I just hope it brings Kaitlyn out of that shell a little more.
Ashley- I think it will.

**MEANWHILE Auntie and Sassy are on the interstate and get off the exit and pull into a truck stop.

Auntie- Alright, Sassy. Pump me 30 bucks worth. You want anything while I'm in there?
Sassy- Maybe a beer.
Auntie- Bitch, you are not having an open container in my car.
Sassy- Please, Mrs. morality! Or was it someone else I burned a body for two weeks ago?
Auntie- I don't want my hearse smelling like Bud Light!
Sassy- Fine! I just wanted to get a heads up on the drinking where we're going.
Auntie- (after a moment) Good point. But dont spill it, Sass. Or you'll be licking it all up like a regular Saturday night.
Sassy- Don't fall in love with a trucker while you're gone, whore!
Auntie- Funny. I was about to say the same thing to you. (Looks over at a masculine looking woman fueling her diesel)

*Auntie walks away and into the store. She approaches the counter where a blonde teenager is playing with her gum.

Auntie- Thirty bucks on number 10.
*The girl is distracted with the TV.
Auntie- Hello! Customer here, Mrs. Monroe!
Cashier- I'm sorry. (giggles) I am just watching Ellen. Don't you love her?
Auntie- (sarcastically) More than life itself! Thirty bucks on number 10.
Cashier- (putting money in register) Today she is giving Halloween costume ideas. I love to dress up. This year I'm going as Shakira.
Auntie- Fitting.
Cashier- What are you going as?
Auntie- A tropical depression.
Cashier- (confused) What is that?
Auntie- I'm going to put on a Hawainn shirt and hold a bottle of Prozac.
*Cashier looks confused.
Auntie- Well it was either that or my Daddys corpse. The depression won!
*Cashier looks frightened.

**MEANWHILE Grace, Elm, JD and Angelito are in the pool.

Angelito- Thanks for getting us high, Elm. I needed something to get myself up this morning.
JD- (to Angelito) I bet you say that alot, Angelito!
Angelito- Suck it, JD!
JD- Get it up first.
Grace- So are you guys coming to the party tonight?
Angelito- Sounds like fun to me. I been wanting some alone time with Kaitlyn. (pause) Ever since Jo left me and everyone else, I've been wanting a new playmate.
JD- Hopefully he'll get one soon. The blow up doll makes too much noise at night.
Angelito- Her name is Bertha, Sarmientos! (They both laugh)
Elm- I hate I got to miss the party but I donated some smoke for everyone.
Grace- I wished you'd stay. Where are you going anyway?
Elm- I told you I'm going to the Tool concert tonight. And since its over in San Fran, I'm spending the night.
Grace- It's going to be a great party.
JD- Definetly. I mean I'm going to be there.
Grace- Are you going to bring your friend, Natasja?
JD- (looks very sad a moment) It would be a shame having a party without her.
Angelito- Just make up with her already, you stubborn Colombian dickhead!
JD- I am very tired of being mad at her. And I am definetly tired of looking at this Rican whore!
Elm- You guys are funny.
Angelito- He's really funny sucking on my burrito!
JD- Well, when you're playing Where's Waldo with a grown man, you'd be laughing too!
*Elm laughs.
Angelito- Oh, Sarmientos loves my cock. He sucks it like a bitch!
JD- Right! I even gave it a name...Carmen Sandiego!
Angelito- Fuck you, Sarmientos!

**MEANWHILE Wout is inside, looking annoyed at Liv, who is playing his PS3.

Wout- Enjoying the game, Liv?
Liv- I'm kicking its ass.
Wout- I was actually thinking about getting some more rest today before the party tonight. I wanna look my best.
Liv- For JD?
Wout- Not just for JD. I love dressing up for a party.
Liv- I can let myself out when I'm through. He's outside in the pool right now, you know?
Wout- Who?
Liv- Who else? JD!
*Wout's eyes get big and he looks out the window.
Liv- Just go out and compliment him. He'll pay attention to anyone if they're buttering him up.
Wout- (watching him outside) He looks so good with his shirt off. I just wanna cover him in whip cream and have a colombian sundae.
Liv- Sounds hairy.
Wout- Liv, I am not trying to be rude but I need some time alone.
Liv- What? You wanna jack off or something? That's all you men do.
Wout- Well, that isn't the point. I've let you use it after you woke me up early this morning. AGAIN.
Liv- (to self) She's getting upset. I guess I'll go. This game sucks anyway.
Wout- Well, thank you, Liv. I guess I'll see you at the party tonight.
Liv- I don't know if I'm going. The bitch might be there. (after a moment as she gets up to leave) Atleast I haven't had to look at Hell's ugly face lately. She spends all her time with that big dork.
Wout- I like Garrett. He seems like a nice guy.
Liv- He's a STUPID guy. What the hell does he see in that fake bitch?
Wout- Well, see you later, Liv! (suggestively)
Liv- Get over yourself.
*As Liv walks out, Wout steps out in his robe toward the pool.
Grace- Hi Wout! How are things going with the apartment?
Wout- Great! (flashes legs at JD)
JD- Hey Wout. I was planning on coming over later. Wanted to talk to you about something.
Wout- Cool! I guess I have time for that. (trying to act disinterested)
Elm- That robe is fucking trippy.
Wout- Thanks. I like to get odd things.
Angelito- Well, you did fuck JD! (laughs)
JD- You are one tired border jumper.
Grace- Are you coming to the party, Wout?
Wout- I wouldn't miss it. (smiles at JD) Well I'm going to get a nap before I get ready. Have fun, guys!
*Wout goes back inside, accentuating his ass movements on the way in.

JD- He is so crazy for me. I am just not that into him anymore. Can't help it.
Grace- You're not! You should tell him then.
JD- I enjoy the attention.
Angelito- Imagine that. (rolls eyes)
JD- Well if you want him so much, you fuck him! He's too monagamous. I am not interested in that right now.
Angelito- Maybe you should be. You're looking older every day, JD!
JD- I guess thats what I get for watching after Chiquita bananna over here. Ages a person quick.
Elm- Well, I gotta go. I have to leave in an hour. It's been fun getting toasty with you all.
Grace- I'll be in soon.
Angelito- Thanks Elm! Appreciate it.
JD- Angelito will suck you off later I'm sure.
Elm- That's quite alright!
Angelito- You're the bigger ho bitch! You like the dick more than I do.
JD- I love listening to your delusions, cocksmoker!
Grace- Actually you both lose. I love the cock more than both of you combined. And lemme tell you, Elm has got a winner!!
Angelito- I bet he does. (looking a bit interested)
*JD laughs at him.
JD- Cocksmoker.
Angelito- Lettuce picker.
JD- Nose picker.
Angelito- Ass sniffer.
JD- Cansado puertorriquenos prostituta.
Angelito- Celoso Colombiano Basurero
JD- Yo te lo pagare con mi pene atras invadiendo su gran butthole!
Angelito- Eres un patetico colombiano sonador. Voy a ser sucio arando su campo antes del mediodia.
JD- Eran sus suenos inalcanzables, como cuando salto la frontera?
Angelito- Yo le deseo tanto que la matanza, Sarmientos!
JD- Whatever, rican whore!

**MEANWHILE Amauriel is waiting to see Tjaman. He approaches a woman at the desk.

Receptionist- I told you he would see you as soon as he is out of his meeting, Amauriel.
Amauriel- You said that an hour ago.
Receptionist- Well, he is a busy man after all. You will just have to wait.
Amauriel- (smiling impatiently) Well hopefully I will see him before the day is over.
*Tjaman walks a man about 7 foot tall out of his office and shakes his hand. They are both laughing loudly.
Tjaman- (notices Amauriel) Sorry to keep you waiting Amauriel! Step in my office.
Amauriel- The wait was nothing. *Receptionist rolls her eyes.
*They step inside the office. Amauriel smells something unusual.
Amauriel- What is that smell?
Tjaman- Oh its nothing. Some internal central heating problems.
Amauriel- Well, I am here. What did you want to see me about, sir?
Tjaman- I have some fantastic news for you, Amauriel. Since you have wisely chosen to go solo, I have a hell of a deal for you to get in on.
Amauriel- Great! Best news I have heard this week.
Tjaman- You have broken the news to your ex bandmates haven't you?
Amauriel- (hesitantly) Not quite yet but I plan to.
Tjaman- Honesty is always the most efficient way. You can't help that you have a better eye for the future than they do.
Amauriel- I was planning on breaking the news this weekend. Ayn already quit the band anyway and she is filing for a divorce.
Tjaman- Nice to hear. You were entirely superior to her anyway.
Amauriel- I appreciate that. I think I am just learning that and it's about time.
Tjaman- I am going to have to be quite upfront with you Amauriel. I also trust that when I am, this information doesn't leave this office. (getting sinister look on his face) I tend to get very upset when my trust is betrayed. You understand I am sure.
Amauriel- Certainly, Tjaman!
Tjaman- Wonderful. Well, Amauriel, I have alot of people within my hub. Lots of people who wish to protect their investments. If some of those people happen to be involved in organized crime or drug trafficking, so be it! The man you saw leaving my office is quite interested in investing with me. He is a mob boss out of Southie and he likes your sound and wishes to be in business with us.
Amauriel- I don't even need to be aware how. I am just grateful for any opportunity you give me, sir.
Tjaman- Oh but you should be aware, Amauriel. So there are no suprises later on.
Amauriel- I don't mind surprises.
Tjaman- Well, you will get alot of those from me. (laughs)

**COMMERCIAL**

noahcrash · by **noahcrash** » Mon Jun 02, 2008 7:46 am

**Lauryn walks into Hailies room in the facility. Hailies isn't there. She walks back out and over to the nurses station.

Lauryn- (to Doya, the nurse behind the counter) Where is Hailies?
Doya- She is probably talking to Mary again.
Lauryn- Could we talk privately a moment?
Doya- Of course Lauryn! I figured you would be by.
*They step off into another room.
Doya- Running low on your pills are you?
Lauryn- Yes. Actually I am. I didn't think I would run out so quickly.
Doya- Noone does. (laughs)
Lauryn- I am only going to get them for awhile until things get easier.
Doya- (wickedly) Of course, Lauryn! I understand. I'm always here to help an old friend from school.
Lauryn- I appreciate it. So who is this Mary Hailies is talking to?
Doya- She's a batshit schizo. Atleast with Hailies, she isn't talking to herself as much.
Lauryn- You don't think she's a bad influence do you?
Doya- If anything, Hailies may be an influence on her. Hailies has developed a personality of sorts I believe.
Lauryn- What do you mean?
Doya- The doctors have observed her talking to the Alex fellow who was murdered in your apartment.
Lauryn- Oh no. I knew they were close. She must be hurting so bad right now. (takes out a pill and pops it) Which room is Mary in?
Doya- Number 347. Don't get lost, Lauryn. If you need me, you know where I am.
*Doya walks out and Lauryn behind her and heads for the room.

*She walks in #347 and sees Hailies and Mary chanting with their eyes closed.

Lauryn- Hello, Hailies.
Hailies- (looks up) Hi Lauryn! This is my new friend, Mary.
Mary- (stands up and approaches her) Hi there. You must be the Lauryn I hear so much about.
Lauryn- I am. Hailies hasn't mentioned you yet.
Hailies- I guess I forgot. This is Mary. She's from Seattle originally. Me and her made fast friends.
Lauryn- Well I was just stopping by to see you.
Hailies- I am glad you did. I miss everyone. I can't wait until I can go home.
Lauryn- (to Mary) What were you guys doing with the chanting?
Mary- We were praying to the god, Alana. She gives deep serenity with proper meditation.
Lauryn- Never heard of her.
Mary- Only special select people can hear Alana. She will speak to Hailies soon I am sure. Hailies is so willing to be open to her ideas.
Lauryn- (worried) Hailies, lets go visit a little. I brought something for you.
Hailies- Great. (to Mary) Well I'll come back by later, Mary.
Mary- We'll be waiting for you, Sister Hailies.
*Lauryn takes her out quickly.
Hailies- Yeah. That's my new friend, Mary. she has helped me alot.
Lauryn- I see that. How are you really honey? I know this hasn't been easy on any of us.
Hailies- I'm glad I am still here. And I'm very glad mine and Alex's baby is in heaven with him now.
Lauryn- (hugs her) I brought something for you as I said.
Hailies- I love presents.
*Lauryn pulls out an ipod.
Lauryn- I took the liberty of downloading all the songs on your computer to it. Thought you might enjoy it.
Hailies- Thanks! This is better than my last one. (hugs it) I will treasure it Lauryn.
Lauryn- I just want you to get better Hailies. Are you sure this Mary is alright?
Hailies- Oh yes. She is wonderful. She understands me.
Lauryn- What is this Alana business?
Hailies- It's just for fun, Lauryn.
Lauryn- (with sigh of relief) Good. These people are in here Hailies because they are having problems of a mental nature. You have to remember that.
*Hailies laughs and hugs Lauryn.
Hailies- Where is everybody else?
Lauryn- They couldn't come today, honey. I just dropped them off at the movies earlier. But they all wanted to say "Hi".
Hailies- I miss them.
Lauryn- We will get you out of here soon. I promise.
Hailies- I know. (She smiles at Alex in the distance.)

***MEANWHILE Ben is at a front door knocking. Hila answers it, bruises on her face.

Hila- It's you again. Hello, Ben.
Ben- What happened to your face?
Hila- It's nothing really. I enjoyed it.
Ben- Are you seeing someone else?
Hila- Well, Ben, I can't wait for a commitment from you can I?
Ben- When did you decide you wanted one of those?
Hila- I don't know. About the time you started ignoring me.
Ben- You don't know what you are talking about.
Hila- Well, you have to admit Ben, you really ask alot of someone.
Ben- You were the one who wanted to know things Hila so I told you.
Hila- I just never expected what you showed me, Ben.
Ben- So you move onto some wifebeater instead.
Hila- Things aren't as they seem, Ben.
Ben- I hope not. It would sicken me if it were.
Hila- You are one to talk. What you showed me was pretty sick.
Ben- (angry, grabbing her arm) WHAT exactly was sick about that?
Hila- ( a little turned on) You have to admit it was weird Ben!
Ben- Don't EVER disrespect me with those words again if you know whats good for you.
Hila- I think its time you go, Ben. I have a visitor coming.
Ben- I bet you do, you scowling whore! *Slams her against the wall, stops, then leaves.
*Hila licks her lips, comes to and shuts the door.

***MEANWHILE Kimmy is putting makeup on, almost ready to go.

Kimmy- While I'm gone today, you could clean up a little. I mean after Hailies is asleep and everything. I will definetly be gone all night as well.
Ryan- I'm sure I could, Kimmy.
Lauryn- How does this look? (turns, showing him her makeup)
Ryan- You always wear your makeup good.
Kimmy- Thanks, honey. *Kisses Ryan I always like to look my best.
Ryan- Me and Harley will be just fine.
Kimmy- I know you will. I do feel bad that I haven't been here as often. But you know very well that taking care of you is never easy. I have to have my break now and again. Surely you understand that.
Ryan- I guess I can be difficult sometimes.
Kimmy- I am so glad you have that kind of compassion, Ryan. It is important in the growth of every man and you are well on your way.
Ryan- (trying to fight back anger) Thank you, Kimmy. Don't know what I would do without you.
Kimmy- I'll get you into shape yet. (looks below his waist) And I'm sure he'll wake back up soon enough. You're far too young to be having these problems. And I am far too young to have to deal with them. You need to work on that, Ryan.
Ryan- I will, Kimmy. I won't disappoint you anymore.
<b<Kimmy- I have faith in you, Ryan. Never forget that. When you've had noone, I have been there. It will always be that way.
Ryan- I know it will.
Kimmy- Well leave me be a few minutes. I am almost ready.

*Ryan walks out and puts his headphones on a minute. Into Your Arms begins to play and Ryan slowly gets a smile on his face.

***MEANWHILE Oba, Eugene, Garrett and Hell are outside of the movie theatre still. Oba and Eugene are smoking.

Garrett- Well, I don't see why we all can't separate awhile today. Me and Hell want some alone time and I think we should all meet back here later tonight before Lauryn gets here. (to Eugene) Can you take care of Oba?
Oba- Take care of Oba!!
Eugene- That's no problem. We understand each other.
Garrett- Make him cool it on the smoking. If Lauryn finds out he started, the shit will hit the fan and I have nothing to do with this.
Eugene- It's just for laughs. I will make sure he understands this. I don't smoke regularly anyway. Just some days when I am out. Thats all.
Garrett- Well, what you do is your business. But Oba don't know much better. He's had a rough go of it.
Eugene- It's all good. So maybe we meet back here about 9:00 and maybe watch a real movie together before she gets us so we have a movie to tell her about.
Hell- Sounds good to me.
Garrett- Yeah. Sounds good. Well, we're off. We're going to hang at the mall awhile and just explore a bit.
Oba- You're gonna fuck like Alex did before he died. (laughs)
Garrett- Don't joke about that, Oba! I AM NOT IN THE MOOD!
Eugene- Come on Oba. Lets watch a movie first, OK?
Oba- Movie!
Garrett- Well see you guys later. (Kisses Hell again before they walk off towards the mall)

*When they are off to a distance, Oba and Eugene start talking.

Oba- I have always hated that smug bastard.
Eugene- Him and that waif are perfect for each other. Now, Oba, do you want to have some real fun today?
Oba- What did you have in mind, Eugene?
Eugene- Not the movies that's for sure! I have some more interesting tasks for us.
Oba- Cool!
Eugene- You game for anything?
Oba- Sure, Eugene. I'm just glad to have a fucking friend who understands me.
Eugene- Like speaks to like Oba!

***MEANWHILE Wout is at home and gets a knock at the door. This wakes him from his nap and he goes over to the door. JD is standing there.

Wout- JD! What a nice surprise. I just woke up so I don't look my best.
JD- Not worried about that, Wout! I just needed to talk to you a moment.
Wout- Sure, lover. Come on in! (smiles)
*JD walks in smugly and sits on the couch. Wout is smiling quite big.
Wout- So what brings you by? Was it my robe earlier? (smiles)
JD- No. It's actually something that has been bothering me for awhile these last couple weeks.
Wout- (concerned) Is something wrong, JD?
JD- Yes. There is, Wout. First of all, I don't understand why you moved here.
Wout- Well, things were not working at my apartment building. I needed a change and I thought "Why Not?". I knew there was an apartment empty here and I thought it would be nice to be closer to you.
JD- I don't know just how to put this delicately. I am kind of..well..I'm not really feeling this anymore. You know what I mean?
Wout- No, what do you mean?
JD- I think things started out interesting between us and everything. I think I've just found as time goes along, we have different interests, Wout.
Wout- Different, how?
JD- You seem to be looking for a boyfriend who is there all the time and only for you. You might be ready for that in your life and I am far from that. I was having fun until you got a little too serious for me. And moving in here is kind of creepy if you ask me. You are crossing the lines a bit too much for my tastes.
*Wout looks as if he is about to well up.
JD- I think you are much better suited to someone who really needs someone else to need them. I am not built that way right now. I am in the prime of my life for christ sakes! Plus we are two different people entirely. Atleast I think we are. I just wanna fuck people right now. I don't ever envision myself falling in love with you, Wout. Or with anyone for that matter. You're too serious for me. You get where I am going with this?
Wout- Ummm.. (voice almost breaking) I think I do.
JD- Now, don't get emotional on me. This is just why this cannot continue. You are too needy. Some people like that. I do not. I like being the age I am and I am not jumping to the next year as quickly as you seem to want to.
Wout- Did our nights together mean nothing to you?
JD- If you want me to be honest, not really. It was fun and you have quite the talented mouth. (smirks) I just don't want this commitment shit.
Wout- You told me you loved me. (starting to cry)
JD- I tell that to alot of people, Wout. It just makes sex mean more. They are only words. Most people understand that. I wish you would have.
Wout- (in shock) I guess I just misread things. Maybe I'm old-fashioned but I don't just say words like that. When I utter them, they mean something and I love you JD. I love the guy behind the other one.
JD- I am just me, Wout. Plain and simple. And I am trying to get us through this like adults. (pause) I would appreciate it if you could stop crying.
Wout- (changing tone, stopping the tears) I wish you could hear yourself. You sound like you have no feeling whatsoever. And my god I never knew what a liar you were!
JD- There's no need to stoop to that, Wout. I think I've been more than kind about this. I could've led you on longer. You don't want to trade insults with me because you wouldn't like what I have to say.
Wout- I can't believe this is happening. Maybe I did midjudge your character by a longshot.
JD- (gets up from couch) Well I am not going to do this. I think you need to work on yourself Wout. You have some emotional problems from where I am standing and a dependency problem. Sometimes when you were sucking on my cock, I was just thankful your mouth was occupied so I didn't have to hear the whiny dreck coming out of it. You went there so I will to.
Wout- (still shocked) I was dressing up for you. What a fool I am!
JD- You should be dressing for yourself. It is dangerous to invest who you are in someone's opinion of you. Especially mine cause I have found I don't like you very much.
Wout- I'd really like for you to leave now. RIGHT NOW!
JD- No problem. I hope this wont affect us as neighbors. The last thing I need here is some obsessed ex.
Wout- You are so stuck on yourself. How do you look in the mirror everyday?
JD- With complete clarity. (pause) You should try it sometime. It would save you lots of heartache. (Opens the door, turns back once and shuts the door)
*Wout bursts into tears and falls onto the couch, robe coming open, heartbroken.

*As he sobs for a minute, he hears something moving in the walls.

Wout- Not again!

***MEANWHILE Auntie and Sassy pull up to the hospice.

Sassy- (practically jumping from the car) Thank God this ride is over!
Auntie- Ditto. If I had to hear your ass complain one more time..
Sassy- You need to retake your drivers tests, bitch.
Auntie- I disagree. I think there should be a fucking class for passengers too. Cause you fucking SUCK at being one.
Sassy- Just be glad this car has stopped. I have beat your ass before and I'd hate to do it again right in front of this hospice.
Auntie- Bitch, I have taken you down more than once.
Sassy- And multiply that number by atleast three and you have how many times I have took you down.
Auntie- That sounds like a challenge to me.
*Aunt Geraldine is running outside with a man in a cowboy hat behind her. Auntie looks annoyed already.
Geraldine- It's so good to see you two again. (goes running to hug Sassy first)
Sassy- Hello Geraldine.
Geraldine- It's been entirely too long since I've seen either one of you. I remember when you were (moving hands to gesture) THIS HIGH!
Auntie- Yes. Seems like fucking yesterday doesn't it?
Geraldine- I see Arlene still has a dirty mouth on her. Some things never change.
Auntie- They certainly do not.
*Auntie smiles in a "Fuck You" sort of way. The man in the cowboy hat approaches her.
Jesse- Well, hey there Arlene. Long time, no see.
Auntie- Funny. Thats the way I remember it when we were dating too.
Jesse- Come on Shortcake. I am real happy to see you.
Auntie- I used to hate when you called me shortcake.
Jesse- You just always tasted like a sweet strawberry shortcake to me. (smiles real big, flashing teeth)
Auntie- Shows what the hell you knew, Jesse.
Jesse- I'm just glad to see you. Can I get a hug?
Auntie- Not if you wanna keep your nuts.
Jesse- Theres that spitfire I miss. Drove my heart and loins crazy.
Auntie- You are definetly crazy.

Geraldine- Let me help you with your things, Sassy. (changing subject) You know there are a few single men here today? Some nice looking gentlemen.
Sassy- When are you gonna give it up. Geraldine?
Geraldine- I just can't help it, Sassy. The lord propels me to atleast try to set you straight.
Sassy- Well, Geraldine. I can't help it either. I'm propelled to bury my face in a hot woman's snatch! (sticks out tongue)
Geraldine- Well I will not listen to this. I'll be inside.
Sassy- Thought you'd never leave!
Geraldine- You listen here, young lady..
Sassy- I am NOT a young lady anymore and I don't have to listen to a goddamn thing you say.
Geraldine- You don't be bringing that blasphemous mouth into your fathers bedside. I wont stand for it.
Sassy- Yeah, some things never change. You are still the same ol judgemental bitch who seems to forget she slept with Dad behind my moms back once.
*Geraldine stomps back inside as Sassy smiles.

Jesse- You should let me take you for a drink afterwhile and catch up, Arlene. You know Im still persistent. I wont quit till you atleast talk to me over a drink.
Auntie- We'll see, Jesse. I just got here. Give a gal some air.
Jesse- I'll give you all the time you need, sweetheart. You've always been worth waiting for.
Auntie- Still spouting off bullshit like you used to, I see.
Jesse- My bullshit couldn't be more sincere baby!
Auntie- It couldn't be more stinky either. I'll talk to you later..perhaps.
*Auntie and Sassy head inside.

Jesse- I'll be out here shortcake. (blows her a kiss) *Auntie shrugs.

*Auntie and Sassy walk into their fathers room and see him connected to a breathing machine, asleep. Auntie looks terribly angry at first, then calms herself. Their cousin, Renee, comes over to them.

Renee- Hi gals! It's been so long. I haven't seen either of you since...well..
Auntie- Since Mom kicked the proverbial bucket. Don't be on tippy toes, Renee. We all now you love that too much.
Sassy- (hugs Renee) Don't mind her! She's still cranky from the trip.
Renee- What did ya'll say to Geraldine. She was fit to be tied coming in here.
Sassy- She just won't let up on the Jesus!
Renee- I know. I don't think she realizes how pushy she is. Plus she's been really upset with Herman being in here. They keep saying "Any day now". She's been judging me too for working the casinos. A blackjack dealer is the devil too it seems.
Sassy- She'll never deal with me being a lesbian! Barely anyone in this family ever could. But I am not the denial daughter anymore and I don't think anyone knows how to handle that so well.
Renee- Do you have a girlfriend?
Sassy- Well, I did actually meet somebody who wasn't put off by the mortician card. She's pretty great actually. It was hard leaving her behind this weekend. I didn't want to tell her where I was coming.
Renee- Why not? You should've brought her.
Sassy- (laughs) And give Dad a heart attack? I'm sure everyone would've loved me more after that.
Renee- He's asked for you and Arlene alot. (touches her shoulder)
Auntie- Fucker has gotten quite old and feeble. Strange to see him like that.
Nurse- He will be glad to see his daughters. He has asked alot about you two.
Auntie- I'll bet he has! (laughs)

***MEANWHILE Liv beats on Auntie's front door. Nick answers it, looking surprised.

Liv- Hi, Nick. Where the fuck is Auntie at today? I have some more gossip I wanted to tell her.
Nick- She isn't here right now.
Liv- Where is she?
Nick- She stepped out for awhile. She'll be back.
Liv- (fanning breasts) It's hot out there today, isn't it?
Armaan- (calling from other room) Nick, did Auntie say she'd be back Sunday or Monday?
Liv- Wow! She's gone for the weekend then. Interesting. You were lying to me, Nick. I should turn you over my knee and spank you. (smiles)
Nick- Don't say anything to anyone. Auntie told us not to tell anybody.
Liv- Wow. it must have been serious then. Can I come in?
Nick- It's not really the best time.
Liv- (grabs Nicks crotch much to Nick's surprise) Anytime is a good time with you, Nick. (lunges up and licks his lips)
Nick- I guess you could come in for awhile.
Liv- I hope it takes longer than awhile.
*Nick lets her in. Armaan comes upstairs.
Armaan- Did you hear me, Nick? (sees Liv) We weren't supposed to let anyone in.
Liv- Well I am NOT just anyone, Armaan. I am an exception to most rules.
Armaan- Auntie would blow a gasket if she knew you were in here.
Liv- So whats it like to murder someone, sicko?
Armaan- I don't know. You tell me, Liv.
Liv- Give me a few moments alone with you and I'll answer you as you breathe your last breath.
Armaan- Don't patronize me little girl!
Liv- You are not tall enough to be intimidating.
*Armaan looks pissed and goes off to the kitchen. Liv laughs.
Nick- You wanna come back to my room for awhile?
Liv- Sure why not? (sees the basement door open and thinks she hears someone moving down there) Lets go, Nick.
*They walk off into Nick's room. Liv is smiling from ear to ear.
*In the kitchen, Armaan grabs a knife from the cupboard and walks out the front door.

**MEANWHILE Amauriel and Tjaman are talking. Amauriel looks frightened.

Tjaman- I am glad we understand each other a little more, Amauriel. I know its alot to take in. (grabs a handful of crickets from a jar and eats them) I love the taste of little insects. Reminds me alot of the drones of the world. Walking around, killing themselves paycheck to paycheck. And for what? To help people like me and you get a few steps farther in the world. I like the trade off personally. Some people just don't have the guts to go for broke. But I can see you are different Amauriel. I have known that since I first heard you sing. You were clearly in another class of people than the others. Your only fault I could see was the willingness to stick around with medicority because you cared about them. Hearts always get in the way to success. That's why there are so many lonely, unsuccessful insects out there. (eats another cricket, crunching it precisely)
Amauriel- Do I get any time to think this over? (sweating)
Tjaman- I'm afraid not, Amauriel. I need an answer before you leave this room. I would not have spoken so candidly to you for a fucking MAYBE. (stares into Amas eyes) I did want you to meet someone who could better help you understand the perks of working for "Tja Trax". (calls out) Tina, darling. Someone wants to meet you.

*Tina walks out nude. Her body is near flawless, her skin tanned to perfection and her smile as wickedly beautiful as a queen. She walks over to Amauriel and touches his hand and motions for him to join her in the room she came from. Amauriel, still a bit frightened, gets up and kisses her. She leads him by hand towards the room she came from.
Tjaman winks at him with an evil grin.

Tjaman- Welcome to Tja Trax, Amauriel! It will be a pleasure doing business with you.

***MEANWHILE Mark goes to Marcus's room while he is changing.

Marcus- Hey Mark! This party is gonna kick ass tonight. Kaitlyn will not be expecting it at all. It's going to be great.
Mark- Yeah! I like Kailtyn alot. She is a tough girl.
Marcus- Yes she is. And so hot! I'd pay good money to fuck her. You think she'd have me? I don't think Rachel's gonna fuck me yet.
Mark- I don't see why not. I think you're one of the hottest men I have ever seen. (stops, realizing what he said)
Marcus- Huh?
Mark- I think you heard me just fine. (decides in a moment to go for broke)
Marcus- Well, thanks, Mark. I appreciate it and all coming from a FRIEND!
Mark- I want to be more than your friend, Marcus. I want you so bad its eating me up inside. THERE! I said it. I went for broke. Say something.
Marcus- What's to say Mark? I thought we were just good friends. Are you telling me this is all you ever wanted?
Mark- Of course not. I am just saying I love you so much and I want nothing more than to express that love for you sexually, Marcus. (goes to touch him)
Marcus- NO! (shoves him away) Why the hell would you do this?
Mark- I told you. I love you.
Marcus- Goddammit Mark! Why do you have to be so damn selfish?
*Marcus storms out of the room.
Mark- (dumbfounded and hurt) What just happened?

**MEANWHILE Eugene and Oba are in a nearby park.

Eugene- So, Oba, you ever feel like all the stuff bubbling up inside of you is too much to take.
Oba- Sometimes it's quite hard to keep this character going. Especially during that hostage situation. It was everything I could do to pretend I wasn't about to shit myself.
Eugene- Me, I like to release my anger in productive ways. (eyes a rabbit)
Oba- And how is that, Eugene?
Eugene- Sometimes you have to take out your frustrations on the earth. It's the only thing that calms my rage most of the time.
Oba- What do you mean?
*Eugene runs up and catches the rabbit.
Oba- What you doing with Thumper man?
Eugene- Well, to me, This bunny could represent alot of things. It could be the time my father burnt me with an iron. It could be the time Jenny Thompson told me I was ugly. It could be the time Mrs. Trump called me a nobody. It could even be the time I caught my girlfriend cheating on me. This bunny could mean alot of things. Instead of taking my anger out on those who hurt me, I pick something I know nothing about, cuddle it up and take my frustrations out on it.
*He slams the bunny into a rock savagely. Oba is speechless.
Eugene- You'd be surprised how much better that feels Oba. You should try it. I'll even make it easier for you. (hands him the dead bunny, its ear are hanging off of its body) Slam it against that rock one good time and tell me if you don't like the feeling. I think we're alot alike.
*Oba takes the rabbit, still in shock. As he stares at its eye hanging out of its socket, he gets an angry look on his face and slams it into the rock. It's head comes completely off.
Eugene- Doesn't that feel better.
*Oba starts to cry.

***COMMERCIAL***

noahcrash · by **noahcrash** » Mon Jun 02, 2008 7:47 am

*Scene opens with Greta and Adam arriving at a pool hall. Greta don't like the looks of the place as she sees a few teenager skinheads walking out.

Adam- You look beautiful tonight, Greta.
Greta- Where exactly are we, Adam?
Adam- This is my favorite hangout. Me and my friends hang out here alot.
Greta- (sarcastically) It isn't called Fagan's is it?
Adam- You said you wanted to see more of what I do. Well this is a big part of it. I love this pool hall. Made so many friends here.
Greta- I will keep an open mind, Adam. You do realize I'm not going to fit in here. I am alot older than everyone I have saw walk through that door since we parked.
Adam- You're very young to me. *Looks at her lovingly
Greta- You're sweet, Adam. I am willing to try..for you. I guess it has to better than you seeing a police standoff on one of our first dates.
Adam- Thank you. It means alot to me.
*They get out of car. Greta sees a goth couple pulling at each others tongue rings.

*They go inside and Greta sees teenagers everywhere. Lets Get Fucked Up is playing. Adam motions at a guy at the pool tables. He comes over.

Adam- Hey Bradin, man!
Bradin- Did you bring your Mom? Hi!
*Greta looks very embarassed.
Adam- No, dumbass! This is my girlfriend, Greta.
Bradin- Oh, damn, I'm sorry. Shit! I was going to say you're a MILF if that helps.
Greta- Don't worry about it.
Adam- (whispers to Greta) Sorry.
Greta- I really don't think I can do this, Adam.
Adam- Relax!
* A few young girls stare her down, smiling, as she walks with Adam.

Adam- So what is the scene tonight, man?
Bradin- Well I think Clarissa is totally into me. She's been watching my ass every time I hit a ball. So naturally I been bending over for her to get a better look. (half-laughs)
Adam- I been missing this place. Sorry I hadn't been around as much.
Bradin- It's not an issue, Adam. If I had a girlfriend, I wouldn't be around here either. (pats his shoulder)
*Greta is looking more progressively uncomfortable with each word.
Adam- So where is everybody else?
Bradin- Most everybody didn't come out tonight. There is some party in the valley everyone is going to. But I'm here, man! That's enough right?
Adam- Of course man.
Bradin- So how is the pizza hell working out?
Adam- Same ol shit. Different day. You know..
Greta- Quite a place here.
Bradin- Don't worry if everyones staring. Newbies always get a stare.
Adam- Well as beautiful as Greta looks, I am sure they will all be looking, jealous of me.
Bradin- Wanna shoot a game?
Adam- Is that cool, Greta?
Greta- Works for me. Whatever you wanna do Adam. (She notices the lady behind the counter staring her down, nodding her head.)
*Adam and Bradin set a game up.

***MEANWHILE Lin, France and Tish are walking on the beach barefoot letting the water splash on their feet.

Tish- This was such an awesome idea. I love the beach. Haven't walked on one since senior trip back in high school.
Lin- I knew you'd enjoy this.
France- The water feels good against my feet. Relaxing. I think we all needed some of that.
Tish- I start work Monday so it feels good to unload a little.
Lin- I'm so glad you're gonna stay with me awhile. I missed you Tish.
Tish- I was kinda missing myself for a while. Sometimes it takes family to bring thngs back into perspective.
France- I shouldn't wore this out tonight. I look like a beggar.
Tish- I think it looks nice.
Lin- Yeah, you are smokin France. I bet that Sassy girl would ravage you if she seen you right now.
France- I just wish I knew what she was doing this weekend. She was so vague about it all. Just suddenley breaking plans. But I promised I wouldn't be dwelling on that. I am here to enjoy the ocean and have a night out with the gals.
*Lin notcies someone familiar up ahead.
Lin- Is that who I think it is?
France- Who?
Lin- That looks like..oh my god it is..It's that gorgeous doctor, Dr. Lee.
Tish- Well go say Hello.
Lin- Who is that woman with him? (she starts to approach them) Dr. Lee, it's me, Lin! Your favorite patient. (approaches and hugs him)
Dr. Lee- Yes, Lin. How are you this evening? What brings you to the beach?
Lin- Well, me and my sister and France wanted to get out and enjoy some beach tonight. (looks at woman) Who is this?
Dr. Lee- Pardon me. This is my wife, Kimba.
Kimba- Hello.
Lin- I didn't even know you were married. I never see a ring on you.
Dr. Lee- Rings and surgery dont go so well together. I don't wear it at work.
Lin- Oh. (after an uncomfortable pause) Well, what brings you and your wife out tonight?
Dr. Lee- We have a beach house out here. We usually come up most weekends I am off. It's a great place to unwind.
Lin- Yeah. It helps to get a reminder just why I movied to this area to begin with. It wasn't for the people. (laughs)
Kimba- I DEFINETLY agree with you there.
Lin- Well, I guess I'll get back to France and Tish.
Kimba- Well our house is just up there. Why dont you all come in for a drink? I make a margarita to die for.
Dr. Lee- She definetly does.
Lin- Well alright. I guess. A drink would be marvelous about now.
Dr. Lee- We were just headed up. We'll be on the patio.
Lin- Sounds good. Get those drinks going.
*Lin walks back over to France and Tish.
France- So whos the other woman?
Lin- His freaking wife!
France- Shit! I'm sorry, Lin. I didn't know he was married.
Lin- Yeah, Neither did I.
France- Guess you learn something new every day.
Lin- So youn guys wanna go up for a drink?
France- I really don't feel like it, Lin. You go have one.
Lin- Damn! How about you, Tish?
Tish- I'm enjoying the air. I think I'd rather stay here with France if its alright.
Lin- Well, damn. I guess so. I won't be long. I'll just go have one drink, stare at him a little more and I'll be back, searching for a man to release my tension. (laughs)
Tish- Ew! My sister doesn't have sex, remember?
Lin- Sure. And your sister dont wanna try out the doctors stethoscope either! (smirks)
*Tish covers her ears.
France- Seriously have fun. We'll be here when you get back.
Tish- You want to set up our blankets, France.
France- I guess so but lets get a little further down. The tide gets rough around here.
Lin- Well, girls, I'll be back and maybe I'll swing a margarita for you two.
Tish- That sounds like a plan.
*Lin winks at them and heads towards the beach house.

***MEANWHILE Lauryn is at home, getting prepared for Ryan. She lights some candles and drapes some colored linen on everything in sight and gets out her special toys for Harley and the playpen. She checks dinner in the oven. Suddenly, there is a knock at her door. She walks over, checking her make-up in the mirror. She answers it to see Ryan holding Harley in the car seat and carrying a large bag in the same hand, other arm in a sling.

Lauryn- Oh my god! It's so good to see you and Harley. (Hugs him tight and kisses Harley on the forehead.) I miss having you two over.
Ryan- I was just glad Kimmy left tonight. I have missed you too. (looks around apartment) Everything looks great. Everything smells lovely too.
Lauryn- What's in the bag?
Ryan- It's a surprise for later. I'll set Harley in her favorite playpen. (Harley laughs, grabbing for the playpen. Ryan sets her in it.)
Lauryn- I got some dinner going for us. Even had the best mashed carrots in the world for Harley. I know thats her favorite. (she is smiling big)
Ryan- You look stunning.
Lauryn- I love that flannel on you. Accentuates your arms. They're so muscular.
Ryan- Thanks. What are you cooking?
Lauryn- Your favorite. My homemade thin crust pizza.
Ryan- Yummy. (can't stop looking at her) I have missed you so bad. I know how difficult these last two weeks have had to be on you, Lauryn. I wished I could've been here to help you.
Lauryn- (getting misty) It's hard thinking about Wegie and Alex and Jo leaving us all at once. Losing you and Harley too definetly didn't help. I guess I've been a basketcase for awhile. It's all I can do not to wake up screaming sometimes. Looking forward to tonight has been a godsend. And Eugene has really helped out. He's such a kind soul.
Ryan- That's what has got me through this week also. I never knew just how wonderful and precious our moments together are until they were taken away. It's really the only time I feel anymore is with you and Harley.
Lauryn- I'm sorry if I made her that much harder to deal with. I just couldn't bare the thought of her bitching at you when you were in that hospital room. My emotions got the better of me. I don't regret hitting her but I wish it didn't cause the friction it has. For that, I am very sorry.
Ryan- (hesitantly) I am glad you did it. Someone needed to tell her a few things. She goes out of her way to make me feel inferior. Some days I forget just why I ever got with her in the first place.
Lauryn- I can imagine, Ryan. (touches his hand)
Ryan- (changes subject) So where are the kids tonight?
Lauryn- I paid their way for a movie fest tonight. I figured its something they all love so I obliged.
Ryan- How is Hailies?
Lauryn- Not so good. I don't want to talk about that right now. Let's focus on what time we have tonight.
Ryan- Of course. (looks at Harley) She loves that playpen.
Lauryn- I know. I missed seeing her in it. How is Greta working out as a babysitter?
Ryan- She's nice and all. But she isn't you.
Lauryn- Thanks, Ryan. You want a beer?
Ryan- But what if Kimmy smells it on me?
Kimmy- I'll give you some breath mints before you leave. (winks) I figured you could probably use one being stuck around her so much these last two weeks.
Ryan- I still don't believe her when she told me she wasn't cheating. I think Auntie was right about what she said that day.
Lauryn- I am sorry Ryan. She is a goddamn fool for not appreciating a man like you.
Ryan- I have been running that day over and over in my mind. I still can't quite believe some of the things Auntie said we all did in our past. (pause) (speaks softly) Some people I can believe being so evil but I haven't been able to stop wondering what in the world someone as wonderful as you could've done.
Lauryn- (like a deer in headlights) I think we should just leave those topics alone tonight and just enjoy our time together before it's over. I personally don't care what you did in your past, Ryan. I know how big your heart is and that is all that matters to me.
Ryan- Yeah. I guess you're right. There is nothing you could do that would make me (stops before he says something else) like you any less.
*There is a knock at the door. Ryan freaks.
Lauryn- Take Harley and hide in the bedroom a minute.
*He takes the playpen with him and goes into her bedroom. Lauryn answers the door.
QB- Hey Lauryn. The party is gonna be going on as soon as Kaitlyn gets back. Ya gonna head over and take a load off for awhile, sugar?
Lauryn- Oh I'm glad it's you QB!
QB- Something smells good.
Lauryn- I have Ryan here tonight. Can you just tell everyone that I'm feeling ill.
QB- Oh, so you got Ryan hiding somewhere do you? (teasingly) You little minx. I'd be glad to cover for you on one condition.
Lauryn- What's that?
QB- Do to that boy what you been dying to for a year now. (nudges her) And tell me EVERY detail- from the size to the width. (laughs)
Lauryn- (slightly embarassed) Ryan probably isn't ready for that.
QB- Honey, men need direction. If we didn't give it to them. they would walk around lost forever.
Lauryn- You're sweet, QB. I appreciate this.
QB- Anytime, love. You have a horrible headcold and you are going to be (winks) in the bed ALL NIGHT.
*Lauryn smiles, hugs QB and closes the door.

***MEANWHILE JD pulls up outside Natalia's apartment looking up at Natasja's window. He walks up actually looking nervous, holding flowers. He starts to knock on the door, stops and does this about three more times. Suddenly, Natasja walks up behind him quietly.

Natasja- Hey there, asshole!
 JD- (startled, turns around) Natty. Hi! I have been an incredible ass and I brought you these. (hands her the flowers) Can you forgive my pride?
Natasja- I missed you, Juan.
JD- I missed you like Joan Rivers misses her eyelids.
*Natasja laughs.
Natasja- I missed you like Auntie misses life before menopause!
*JD and Natty both laugh. He hugs her.
Natasja- There's so much I've been wanting to tell you about. Natalia and Shivkala are some fucked up people, Juan. I have so much to tell you.
JD- Lets never fight again, OK!
Natasja- As stubborn as we are, you know that isn't possible. The important thing is I know we'll always make up and you'll always bring me cheesy flowers. (uses them like an oriental fan)
JD- I know they're lame.
Natasja- No, I love these cheesy flowers. They're gorgeous. Each dozen you ever got me have all been gorgeous.
*Jd smiles at her.
JD- I guess I'm fucking predictable huh?
Natasja- I promise not to tell anyone if you promise to never change.
JD- (hugs her) Deal. So tell me about your two incredibly fucked up roommates who should've been me and Angelito.
Natasja- Get this! (whispers though noone is around) THEY ARE BROTHER AND SISTER!
JD- Get the fuck out of here!
Natasja- NO! I am so serious, JD!
JD- And they sleep in the same bed?
Natasja- When they SLEEP, Jd! When they sleep.
JD- (laughs lasciviously) Holy fuck Natty! Have you ever watched them?
Natasja- DO I even have to answer that?
JD- Ha Ha! Of course you have.
Natasja- (laughs) I have always been that sick bitch who stopped to look at every gory detail of the train wreck.
JD- That's why I love you so!
Natasja- Well, before you even ask, do you want to go in and be a dirty voyeur? (laughs)
JD- Yes I do! I also wanted to invite you to Kaitlyn's birthday party tonight. Everyones gonna be there.
Natasja- Well maybe we'll go later. But for now, you gotta come see the freakshow.
*They run inside like giddy little kids.

***MEANWHILE Ben walks into "The Dez". It is completely empty except for Dezzie, who is about to fall asleep.

Dezzie- (hearing the door shut) Oh, Ben. I might've known you'd be by.
Ben- You know what I want, Dezzie.
Dezzie- The usual. What else? As you can see, it is severely dead tonight. I was thinking about closing up early but as soon as I do, everyone will show up. That's the way it goes. "Vik's Stik" is having Chippendales strippers tonight. I never saw what was so special about them? Most of them look the same to me.
Ben- You look smashing tonight.
Dezzie- (sighs) Oh Ben! Lets not go there tonight. Every time you come in here has began to more increasingly uncomfortable with me because you won't stop coming onto me and I think I have made it very clear I can't go there again. (notices his knuckles are scabbed over) Did you get into another fight?
Ben- Not unless you count a wall.
Dezzie- It seems everytime I see you, theres a new wound to look at.
Ben- I guess I'm a dangerous character.
Dezzie- Don't I know it? (hands him his drink)
Ben- You smell as nice as ever.
Dezzie- (changing subject) You want to play something on the jukebox? It's so quiet in here. I almost fell asleep wiping this damn counter.
Ben- The sight of you puts a tune in my head every time.
Dezzie- Ben, I said STOP IT. I am trying to be your bartender here. You are just lonely and missing Suzanna again.
Ben- I DON"T WANT TO TALK ABOUT SUZANNA! THIS IS NOT ABOUT HER!
Dezzie- See, there you go getting all fired up again. Theres noone here to strangle tonight, Ben. Unless you strangle me.
Ben- (calming down) I just don't wish to speak of her tonight. (swigs his drink)
Dezzie- Or ever? Anyway, how's your drink?
Ben- It's fine!
Dezzie- Are you still seeing Hila?
Ben- Not anymore.
Dezzie- I thought you liked her.
Ben- She isn't you.
*Dezzie looks uncomfortable.

***MEANWHILE Auntie is having a cigarette outside and Jesse approaches her again.

Jesse- I didn't know you were smoking again. What brought that on, shortcake?
Auntie- Do I have to keep telling your redneck ass I DONT LIKE that nickname!
Jesse- You used to.
Auntie- Well, I used to do alot of things. People change, Jesse. Haven't you changed? (winces) Or I forgot you'll never fucking change.
Jesse- I've grew up alot, Arlene. Not a day passes by that I don't regret letting go of you.
Auntie- Good. I hope it drives you to drink and wake up in a pool of your own vomit.
Jesse- When did you get so hostile?
Auntie- Oh, Jesse, baby, you aint seen hostile!
Jesse- I bet I'd like to see it! (winks) What you been doing up there in L.A.?
Auntie- Just living day to day.
Jesse- Ever since you hooked up with that Tja fucker, you done forgot about all of us! But we haven't forgot about you.
Auntie- As hard as it seems to be to get through your thick skull. I don't hold all these memories as dear as you do. I hate that son of a bitch dying in there. I just came here to say my peace when he wakes up. Once I do that, I'm hitting the road. And when he's dead, I wont have another reason to come back to this annoying house on the prairie!
Jesse- You still didn't really answer me. What you been doing up there in the big city these last nine years?
Auntie- You wouldn't believe me if I told you. And don't ask, briar patch, cause I'm not offering the answer.
Jesse- You make my heart flutter, shortcake. You remembered your nickname for me.
Auntie- I assure you it was an accident brought on by the poisionous fumes of that Stetson you still wear. Same bottle since nine years ago I bet too!
Jesse- I always loved your filthy mouth.
Auntie- Well its gotten filthier and so have I.
Jesse- All I see in front of me is that same beautiful girl who pulled Kayla Childress out of that goddawg ferris wheel because she thought I was cheating on her. You pulled three fucking balls of that skanks hair.
*Auntie laughs, getting caught off guard.
Auntie- I scared that black bitch white! (cackles)
Jesse- (looks as if he might cry) Why did you leave me here all alone, shortcake? I drank the whole first year away missing you. Every time I looked out my window at the seesaw over at Harrys trailer, my heart just broke. Thats where we had our first kiss. I fell in love with you that night and I have never stopped loving you. I have had four relationships since you and they all failed faster than they started because they weren't you, shortcake. Some nights I'm so lonely I just wish somebody would kill me and end this heartache. My heart only beats for you, Arlene. Without you, I'm so empty. When you pulled up again today, I felt so alive again. Like something just reached into my chest and beat my heart back into pumping.
*Auntie looks as if she might cry.
Auntie- I'm sorry, Jesse. Some things happened and I didn't have time to explain. I just had to go then and there. If I would have stopped to say goodbye, I wouldn't have left that night and I'd still be another poor bitch in a pissant town.
Jesse- You were always better than this town. You brightened it up. I never needed to see the stars at night after I met you. The only time I ever noticed em again is when you left me. (a couple tears fall down his cheek) Can I show you something? (wiping his eyes)
Auntie- I've seen that before Jesse! (cackles) I remember it fondly actually.
Jesse- (laughing) No, not that, shortcake.
Auntie- What the hell? (She gets up) Jesse, baby, don't cry. If the wrong woman sees that, she'll rip your heart out and feed it to ya. I couldn't bare to see that happen.
Jesse- No other woman will get my heart cause it's still yours. Come with me! *He walks her over to his car.
Auntie- You still have this Chevelle? I always knew that damn thing was indestructible. After everything we done in it, it has to be! (cackles)
*Jesse turns the car on. A familiar song begins to play. I Go Crazy starts playing. Auntie almost tears up. He shows her her senior pic in his dashboard.

Hello girl it's been awhile
Guess you'll be glad to know
That I've learned how to laugh and smile He looks at her lovingly

Getting over you was slow
They say old lovers can be good friends He looks at her and asks "Will you dance with me one time- just for old times sake?"
But I never thought I'd really see you,
I'd really see you again She looks at him lovingly and says "Sure Briar Patch"

I go crazy They begin to dance.
When I look in your eyes I still go crazy
No my heart just can't hide that old feelin' inside
Way deep down inside
Oh baby, you know when I look in your eyes I go crazy He says "I'll never forget how you feel in my arms" He starts to sob.

You say he satifies your mind
Tells you all of his dreams Auntie says "Oh, honey, dont cry!"
I know how much that means to you "I still love you so much it hurts" Jesse says. "I'll never forget how much your little heart broke when your Momma died".

I realize that I was blind Auntie starts to cry. "I did miss you Jesse. Oh shit! I don't even remember who I was then."
Just when I thought I was over you
I see your face and it just ain't true Jesse says "I'll never forget. I still see her, don't you?"
No it just ain't true

I go crazy
When I look in your eyes I still go crazy Auntie says "Oh honey, she's gone. She is dead." Auntie sobs uncontrollably
That old flame comes alive, it starts burning inside
Way deep down inside Jesse says "I still feel her right here with me (touches his heart)" They dance silently holding each other. They start to kiss.
Oh baby, you know when I look in your eyes I go crazy

Oooh, Oh Oooh, Oh

I go crazy
You know when I look in your eyes I go crazy
No my heart just can't hide that old feelin' inside
Way deep down inside
I go crazy They start taking off each others clothes and get into Jesse's backseat.

***MEANWHILE Liv sees Nick is asleep, tired from the sex they just had. She gets up quietly and heads for the basement. She tiptoes down the stairs and sees the man in bandages sleeping. She sees a file cabinet in the corner. The top drawer is open. She tiptoes over to it and starts looking in.
Man In Bandages- (suddenly) I know where the key to the other drawers is if you're interested. *Liv smiles.

***MEANWHILE Hell and Garrett are on top of the mall.
Hell- This was your best idea yet, Garrett. This is one of the craziest things I think I ever done. I was so sure that janitor would see us.
Garrett- I told you he wouldn't. I have been wanting to get you alone, Helen. I just wanted to tell you (stifles a little) that I don't think I have ever felt this way about someone before. Just seeing you smile makes all the anger I've had built up feel so pointless. It's as if it is all better when I see you. That is all it takes. (kisses her)
Hell- I have to tell you something too, Garrett. I have been thinking alot about how much I want to express to you what you mean to me intimately. But, before I do, I want to tell you something.
Garrett- What is it, Helen?
Hell- I know you've heard alot said about JD and me and Liv living there and what has supposedly happened there. And some things have granted but when it comes to actual sex, intercourse that is, I am still a virgin.
Garrett- (holds her) I'm glad that perv didn't take it from you.
Hell- I just wanted to tell you this because I think I want you to take it. Infact, I've never wanted to give somebody something more in my whole life.
*Garrett leans in and kisses her.

**MEANWHILE Ayn and Kaitlyn pull up to the apartment.

Ayn- I promised Ashley we'd stop in and show her what we got. (carrying bags)
Kaitlyn- I really appreciate all this stuff you got me. I will so be paying you back, Ayn.
*They walk up to the apartment. Ayn knocks.
Ayn- She said she might be sleeping and to just let ourselves in and wake her.
Kaitlyn- Alright.
*They open the door and everyone jumps out and says "SURPRISE". Kaitlyn looks floored!
Ayn- Ash found out it was your birthday. Surprise!
Kaitlyn- Holy shit!
*Grace walks up and puts a party hat on her.

***COMMERCIAL****

noahcrash · by **noahcrash** » Mon Jun 02, 2008 7:48 am

*Scene opens as Greta and Adam are still in the pool hall.

Greta- Adam, I am ready to go. I'm not having any fun at all. Can we go back to the party for Kaitlyn? I am sure its going on right now.
Adam- Why aren't you having fun? I thought you said you weren't old in spirit.
Greta- Do I have to spell it out for you, Adam? I AM OVER 30!!
Adam- So?
Bradin- (hearing conversation) Why do you want him to leave his friends? That really sucks.
Clarissa- (hanging all over Bradin) Yeah! What's your problem, lady?
Greta- OK. They went there. I'll tell you what my problem is, you gap-toothed bitch! (gets louder) Since I stepped into this fucking place, I feel like my IQ is draining faster than the quarters in your pocket. I AM PAST THIS! I have lived this life, little girl. And you are just starting..and off to a bad start where I can see. Your pants are gonna be off in just a few hours and this Bradin fucker will be sticking his teenage dick in you and soon you'll be likely to get pregnant when he begs you one night, saying he'll pull out. This scene is all too damn familiar BUT I HAVE LIVED THIS ALREADY! I am not about to live it again and Adam, you have disrespected me from the moment I walked in here. I dont feel welcome. You haven't even helped me try to adjust. All you can pay attention to is your dickhead friend who obviously doesn't care about you. All he wants to do is beat you at pool to help his pimply ass get laid! And he wants to break us up so he can feel superior again. WELL FUCK THIS! I can't watch another minute.
*Greta storms out and Adam goes to chase her out the door.
Bradin- What an old bitch!
Clarissa- Fuck her!

*Adam chases her to the catr.
Adam- Greta stop! Im sorry. I've been a terrible boyfriend.
Greta- Everyone in that goddamn place was staring at me, Adam. EVERYONE! Why did I subject myself to that humiliation?
Adam- I'm sorry. I guess it was a bad idea. (tries to hold her and she resists) Please, Greta. I'm sorry. Don't hate me!
*Adam goes to hug her again and she lets him, hugging him back.

***MEANWHILE Lin is having her third margarita at Dr. Lee's house.

Lin- Goddamn! That was one funny ass story, Kimba.
Kimba- (laughing) He was just standing there with this fucked up look on his face saying "how the fuck did this fish get here?" (They all die laughing)
Dr. Lee- Being a doctor is never as boring as people think.
Lin-France and Tish are going to kill me. These margaritas are just so fucking good.
Dr. Lee- You like them, do ya?
Kimba- I told you I make the best margaritas. Was I right or was I right? (laughs)
Lin- You were damn right! I am still wondering how I will get off this chair. (cackling again)
Kimba- Maybe you should stay a little longer.
Dr. Lee- Maybe you should. Did I tell you how sexy you look tonight?
Kimba- He is right.
Lin- (almost chokes on her drink) What?
Kimba- Me and my husband are swingers. We'd both really like to fuck you now. You'd be amazed between my strap on and his cock what pleasure we could bring you. (smiles)
Lin- (stunned) Run that by me again!

***MEANWHILE France and Tish are laying down on the beach.

France- Where is that bitch? She has had enough time for six margaritas. I knew that was a bad idea.
Tish- Can I tell you something France?
France- Sure. It's not like we got anything else to do.
Tish- You have to promise not to tell anyone.
France- Whatever you say stays between us. I'm glad I remembered that Crown Royal or we'd be sober right now. (laughs)
Tish- I have loved this time without Lin. She is still so prudish with me sometimes. She forgets how old I am I think.
France-Well, she's your sister! Your very late sister. (laughs)
Tish- The reason I wanted to stay here with you is something else altogether.
France- What's that Tish?
Tish- I'll just be blunt. I have wanted to have a lesbian experience for years now and I think you are the hottest opportunity I have ever had and I want you really bad..right now..right here!
*Frances mouth drops open.

***MEANWHILE Kimmy is in a hotel room again with Elm.

Elm- Well we're finally back Kimmy. I couldn't wait for that movie to end. You look so damn sexy tonight, I was ready to eat you up right there in front of everyone.
Kimmy- You're looking quite good yourself. I just wish we didn't have to go to the same damn hotel room everytime.
Elm- Well what else could we do? You don't want your pussy boyfriend to find out so where else ya wanna go? Grace is a gossip queen. We could never go to my apartment.
Kimmy- I don't know. Maybe I just want some variety. The woods, a park, anything. This hotel is just tired. Don't you think?
Elm - Any place is fine with me as long as we can toke and me and you can fuck.
Kimmy- Do you love me, Elm?
Elm- Huh?
Kimmy- You heard me, asshole! Do you?
Elm- I thought we agreed to not bring those kinds of emotions into this. It takes the thrill out of it.
Kimmy- I was just checking. No big fucking deal. (quietly wounded) Let's fuck!!

***MEANWHILE JD and Natasja are watching Shivkala and Natalia fucking.

JD- (now shirtless) Oh my god! It feels so wrong and yet watching it seems so right. (laughs)
Natasja- I always like watching things I'd never do. It turns me on like nothing else.
JD- We have always had that in common.
Natasja- We have alot of stuff in common.
JD- I love that about us, Natty.
Natasja- (takes off her shirt, she isn't wearing a bra) Now we have something else in common.
JD- Damn, I have always loved your nipples. They're so fucking supple. So inviting.
Natasja- Why don't you suck on them JD?
JD- (getting hard) I'd love to, Nats!
*JD leans over and licks her nipple.

***MEANWHILE everyone at the party is talking in different places in the room. Too Drunk To Fuck is playing on the stereo. Followed by ADIDAS by Korn

*Wout and QB are talking in Mark's bedroom.
Wout- I just can't believe him. All of that was for nothing. I wasted my energy, my heart and my apartment- the one without funny noises! I am the biggest fucking patsy, QB!
QB- Wout, my friend, I have been through that ringer more times than I care to tell. All you can do is brush yourself off, get back up and go try again. Don't let some user like JD bring you down. I used to want him too when I first started being the mailman here. He always came out shirtless or in skimpy shorts, showing off those sexy brown legs. Seeing stuff like that makes a queens heart race. (laughs) But the point is I still always knew from the first moment what he was. And I knew if I even so much harbored the possibility of asking him out, I'd be hurt. But I am often hurt. I am a heavy set gay man in a thin world. That is truly one of the hardest routes any fag can take.
Wout- But you're so kind, QB! I can't believe someone hasn't already scooped you up.
QB- That's just it, Wout. Noone wants to scoop this fat man up? (laughs in spite of himself)
Wout- I think you're adorable. You have that winning smile people can't duplicate. Your personality is through the roof. You're so clever. You're a great catch!
QB- Quick! Can you tell everyone else that?
Wout- Sure. Can you tell them I am too? (They both laugh)

*Glenn and Shawn are talking to Em, who looks coked out on the couch.

Glenn- Are you as drunk as I am? (laughs)
Shawn- This definetly wasn't quite what I thought. You have some interesting friends, that's for sure. I don't think I've ever seen so many different psycho analysis's in one room.
Glenn- I really wished your sister wasn't going home tomorrow.
Shawn- I am only two hours away, Glenn. I'd be glad to make a trip back and forth to see you. My work is very independent. I can do it from anywhere really. I think I am getting quite pissed on this vodka. (laughs)
Glenn- Billy has spent so long in that coma. I think some part of me has accepted the fact he probably won't wake up. And still theres that lonely part of me that wants to believe whole-heartedly that he will.
Shawn- You have to hope for the best, Glenn.
Glenn- Let me finish. (pause) I have been anything but bold lately. My life is in an uproar right now and I feel like I can't keep up with the pace it's going. And the worries I have right now are anything but easy. Then I meet you, Shawn. A completely unexpected surprise. You are probably the ONLY sane thing in my life right nw. And even though my heart was a guard on it with Billys name, you're breaking through that with alot of force.
Shawn- (relieved) I like you too, Glenn. I look into your sad eyes and I see so much pain, so many secrets. I just feel compelled to reach in, grab them and wash them outta there.
Glenn- Will you make love to me Shawn? Will you help me forget my life- just for tonight?
*Shawn looks touched and nervous all at once.
Em- Just fuck already. This foreplay is boring as hell.

*Angelito is smoking a joint to himself in the bathroom. Ashley comes beating on the door.

Ashley- Who the hell is in there? I have got to pee SO DAMN BAD!
Angelito- Hold your bladder, Ashley. I am smoking myself a joint.
Ashley- Angelito, open this fucking door right now or when you leave this room, I am going to piss all over your Puerto Rican face.
Angelito- What you want in here for, senorita? There are no lesbians in here. (laughing, stoned)
Ashley- I AM NOT A LESBIAN, Angelito! Open the door!
Angelito- And I am not a Puerto Rican whore either. (laughs louder)
Ashley- Angelito, if I have to bust this door in, you are going to be fucking sorry you ever popped out of your spick mothers cunt.
Angelito- Poor dike has to piss. I feel sorry for you. Just piss in the floor. Lesbians don't usually worry about etiquette, senorita!
Ashley- Goddammit! I am serious, Asshole!
Angelito- Me too, Melissa Etheridge!
*Ashley beats at the door.

*Mark takes Marcus off to the side. Both of them are lit.

Marcus- What is it, Mark?
Mark- I just wanted to get you alone for a minute.
Marcus- We gotta hurry. Rach and Vik will be looking for us.
Mark- Do you like her, Marcus?
Marcus- Rachel seems like a good girl. Still getting to know her really.
Mark- I just wanted to say (getting emotional) you hurt me alot today!
Marcus- I thought we agreed to be friends Mark. I am still hurt you'd infringe on that for a selfish sexual impulse.
Mark- YOU AGREED! I still love you dammit.
Marcus- Look, Mark, this is a party. I don't want to be depressed. It's a fucking birthday party. Enjoy yourself! Can't we just get past this and be friends?
Mark- Will you hold me?
Marcus- LOOK MARK! I'm serious. Go talk to Vik. I am not discussing this anymore. *Leaves the room
*Mark takes a long drink of rum and leaves the room.

*Miko (a guy Ashley invited from work) is talking on a couch to Grace.

Grace- Ashley sounds like she's just as much fun at work.
Miko- That girl is always a trip. There is nobody who cracks us up faster. Some of the stunts she pulls are what makes working there a real treat.
Grace- So, Miko, are you single?
Miko- Look at the silly way I dressed up trying to impress people. What do you think? (laughs)
Grace- I like your outfit. I think its different. It says alot about who you are and your individuality. That is a trait that can't be falsified. I see people trying all the time. It just doesn't work that way.
Miko- I appreciate that. It must be a real thrill playing in a band.
Grace- Well, the band has pretty much broken up as of late. We lost our lead singer. He hasn't officially told us but I feel it in my bones. He is moving on from us. He thinks he is so much better than we are. If he leaves us, I promise I will make it my lifes mission to be the best damn band to ever grace L.A. And when he is ever against us (getting louder) and it will happen BECAUSE KARMA IS A BITCH, we will slaughter him. He will be so torn apart, all that will be left on the floor is one fine fucking mess!! (laughs)
Miko- You are drunk.
Grace- So are you. (teasingly)
Miko- I believe you are quite right.
Grace- You wanna fuck?
Miko- GOD YES!

*Rach and Vik are near them and feeling quite alone. Suddenly, Marcus comes over to them.

Marcus- I am sorry I've been detained. I haven't meant to ignore you. It's just been so crowded in here.
Vik- Atleast you've talked to Rachel. Mark has bearely said hello to me.
Marcus- He's having a rough night. You wanna get out of here, Rachel? Get some breakfast. It's getting too loud for me in here in every way.
Rach- Sure! (to Vik) Bye Vik. I'm sure Mark will be out here soon.
Vik- He better or I'm leaving soon. I missed the stippers at my own club tonight for this.
*Marcus and Rach leave. Mark comes out, crying, walks over to Vik.
Vik- There you are. Where have you been, Mark?
Mark- Will you take me into some room and make love to me? I feel so alone my heart may break if you don't.
*Vik looks concerned, gets up off of the couch.

*Ayn takes Kaitlyn to Ashley's room.

Kaitlyn- This has been one of the most unexpected yet killer parties anyone has ever thrown for me! I will be talking about this night for years to come, Ayn, and I have you and Ashley to thank for it.
Ayn- Well, I wanted to take you to the side before I got too plastered and give you my gift in secret. I am still extremely grateful to you for taking me in when noone else would. That meant alot. Noone ever has been there to help me when I was down like you did.
Kaitlyn- Girl, it was nothing. I've been there, breaking up with a bastard. You feel like you are starting from square one.
Ayn- And for me its a DAMN GOOD SQUARE! I haven't loved him for awhile noe really. It just took the wrong thing at the wrong fucking time to give me the courage to bail. BEST DECISION I HAVE EVER MADE!
Kaitlyn- Well you're a phenomenal roommate. Few of the people I have actually called friends have done something so wonderful as you and Ash did. I hate birthdays! They remind me of nothing but the horrible past ones that have all been very gray, Ayn. At some point, I said to myself I didn't even want to celebrate them and FOR FOUR YEARS I haven't. Not even a cake. And you and Ashley snuck and saw my drivers liscense and here we are. I will never forget this night.
Ayn- Neither will I! *Hugs Kaitlyn tight
Kaitlyn- Thanks Ayn! (about to cry but stops herself)
Ayn- Ok! Now for your gift! (hands her a bag) One is here and one is something I want to tell you.
Kaitlyn- I can't wait! *Opens up the bag and sees a pair of tickets to see The Ringling Brothers Circus.
Ayn- There! Now you can see what you always wanted to see.
Kaitlyn- Oh my god! WOW! My dad always promised he'd take me to the circus when I was little. After he died before he could, I said I'd never go. (looks at Ayn) This means so much to me!
Ayn- You're welcome and I'm drunk! (laughs again)
Kaitlyn- This is so amazing, Ayn!
Ayn- Now I have something to tell you but you have to keep it completely secret. I may regret this tomorrow but it feels right at this moment. As lonely as I have been before you helped me, I owe this much to you.
Kaitlyn- What is it?
Ayn- It's about that meeting with Auntie. I want to share something with you.

***Back at Lauryn's, Harley is restless.

Lauryn- She is so tired. (rocking her) I wish I could just help her to sleep.
Ryan- That was one of the best dinners I think I have ever had. Tonight has done me so much good. These last few weeks I have just felt ready to give up, you know. To be perfectly honest, you and Harley are the only joys I have left in life.
Lauryn- (sets harley in crib) It doesn't have to be, Ryan. It doesn't have to be at all. You need to be happy. If you aren't in an environment that helps you thrive, you're just slowly going to wither, Ryan. You will wither until there is nothing left. I know because I almost went there.
Ryan- I want to give you the thing I brought you.
Lauryn- Oh goodie! I have been dying to know what's in there.
*He hands it to her. She opens it up and sees the picture he drew of her. It is beautiful and has an XO at the bottom. Lauryn looks at him lovingly.
They start to move closer and Harley starts crying again.
Ryan- (gets up) What's wrong sweet thing? (picks her up) Tell Daddy what's wrong.
*Lauryn continues to look at picture, holding back a tear.
Ryan- I bet I know what you wan't. (looks at lauryn) Sometimes I play her oldies on the oldies station at night when she is really restless. I know she's had enough to eat and she's been changed and she's been held. I bet she wants to hear that music. Do you have a radio, Lauryn?
Lauryn- Yes, right behind you.
Ryan- I didn't even see it. (He lays Harley down) Daddy loves you so much, Harley. Now let me get your music for you. (Harley stops crying)

*Ryan turns on the radio, looking for the oldies station. Lauryn watches him. She has never felt more in love than at this moment.

*He finds it. The song Come Softly To Me starts to play. SCENES UNDER LYRICS HAPPEN DURING THOSE LYRICS!

Dom Dom Dom a du Dom Dommy do

Lauryn gets up, walks over to
Ryan, turns him around and starts to kiss him. He kisses back passionately. She starts to pull up his shirt. 

Come softly darling, come to me stay
You're my obsession, forever & a day

 Dezzie watches the clock ticking, the bar empty and Ben very sullen. She comes across the counter and starts kissing him. Camera cuts to Hell and Garrett sleeping together, their kisses sweet and pure. Camera cuts to Liv pulling the Man In Bandages cock out of his pants, tearing under the bandages. She straddles him. Camera cuts to JD making love to Natasja. They both smile in a humorous way at each other. Camera cuts to Phi and Jd's Cat Connor gong at it on JD's porch.

I want, want you to know, I love, I love you so
Please hold, hold me so tight, all through, all through the night

Camera cuts to Auntie and Jesse making love in his car. Auntie seems to be having an out-of-body experience. Camera cuts to Hailies in her room, imagining Alex there kissing her and touching her.Camera cuts to Adam making love to Greta in his car. Greta is smiling again, feeling young.

Speak softly darling, hear what I say
I love you always, always, always

Camera cuts to Wout and QB who begin to kiss. They both start hesitant, then lock lips tighter and start undressing each other. Camera cuts to Glenn and Shawn who are making love in the floor. Glenn is crying softly, happy. Camera cuts to Miko and Grace having a rowdy time to themselves. Camera cuts to Vik laying Mark down on the floor and kissing him, Mark pulling him close. Camera cuts to Ayn and Kaitlyn as Ayn says" lets comfort each other Kaitlyn" and they start to kiss. Camera cuts to Angelito opening door for Ashley. She is madder than hell. He starts to kiss her, she violently kisses back, throwing him on the floor, undressing him. Camera cuts to Lin, Dr. Lee and Kimba having sex together. Camera cuts to France making out with Tish and starting to go down on her. Camera cuts to Kimmy and Elm making love on the bed, Kimmy looking at him, Elm looking away.

I've waited, waited so long, for kisses & your love
Please come, come to me, please come, softly
I want, want you to know, I love, I love you so
I need, need you so much, I want to feel your touch

Now we are back to Ryan and Kimmy. Ryan lays her on the bed, kisses her breasts, almost crying. Lauryn kisses him hard on the neck, biting him hard, the soft. He takes his pants off quickly and enters her, leaning in to kiss her.

Come softly darling...

He moves slow, looks at her and says "I Love You Lauryn. I always have.". "I Love you too" she says "More than anything ever". They kiss and make love until the song fades out.

*The end of song plays just as a cut of Armaan is shown raping a girl we've never seen and beating her senseless, screaming "Why" at her!

***THREE HOURS LATER we see Auntie get up in the Chevelle and Jesse is sleeping sound. She gets dressed, eyes red from crying. She sees her sister in the distance crying. She gets angry, stomps up. afraid he died before she made her peace.

Auntie- ( to Sassy) Don't tell me he's dead!
Sassy- Where have you been? He isn't dead. I wished the bastard were. He told me he could never forgive me for being a lesbian. (crying) He's fucking awake alright. The dirty son of a bitch!

*She walks in to his room. Noone is around at the moment. He is awake staring at ceiling.

Auntie- Hello, Paps!
*He turns to see Auntie.
Paps- (barely able to breathe) Arlene, its you!

*Auntie walks over to him with angry look in her eyes.

Auntie- Now you listen here paps! I came here for one reason and one reason only. Now that your sick ass is awake, its time you listen for a change. (pinches his breathing tube) I haven't been able to face you for many years now and I have took my hatred of you and threw it upon so many people who didn't deserve it, paps! I just want to tell you (getting angrier) THAT YOU ARE SICK! You messed with me from the time I was six to the time I was 14. You made me feel like trash! YOU MADE ME FEEL LIKE SKUZZY, DIRTY TRASH! *pinches it harder You ruined me. You spoiled my body before I even knew what to do with it. You and all your goddamn mob dealings decided my life before I even understood it. You destroyed me daddy and you destroyed Sassy too. You made her feel unloved and it has carried through on her her whole life. Well, I wont let you have the last laugh. I came here, as I said, for one reason and one reason only- and it is to take your last breath from you. They say getting old is like becoming a child again, daddy. I hope you feel like an innocent child. I WAS ONE TOO ONCE! And you robbed me of it, motherfucker!! Now I am going to rob you of yours.

*Her dads eyes raise in terror as he dies seeing her angry face pinching his breathing tubes. Camera fades out from the view of his eyes, dying as Auntie softly laughs in his face.

***Qb wakes up, goes outside, staring at the people in different sexual positions, surprised at some. He walks outside for some air. He sees a blonde girl stumbling up the walkway, naked, beaten and falling to the ground.
Anna- Help me! (She passes out)
*Qb runs to her aide.

**Liv is up already, laughing holding alot of files she has been up reading.

***Amauriel wakes up later with Tina at his side. He realizes it is morning and freaks out, getting up and getting fully dressed. He looks at Tina and walks out of the room. He hears chanting coming from another room inside Tja's place. He walks closer to the noise, looking confused at the night's events. He gets closer and sees Tjaman in a satanic ceromonial robe shouting in tongues and putting his hand over a fire.
CAMERA PANS TO A FRIGHTENED AMAURIEL!

****ENDING CREDITS ROLL to Toxicity by System of A Down

MadGuy · by **MadGuy** » Tue Jun 10, 2008 8:55 am

My second favorite episode so far. Great way to continue the fine fucking mess of the previous episode.

SERIAL Episode 5- "What A Fine Fucking Mess"

What did you think of this episode?

SERIAL Episode 5- "What A Fine Fucking Mess"

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